Happy birthday, Jurassic Park!

[djonn]

cadhla points out that today is the 17th anniversary of a historic incident on a fictional island off the coast of Costa Rica, wherein a gentleman named Hammond -- not the one from Stargate SG-1 -- managed to lose a lot of his guests to a horde of ravening velociraptors (among other things).  In the comment thread, pope_guilty asks the musical question, "How did Hammond go from a scheming, investor-defrauding bastard in the book to Walt Disney in the movie?"



Mine, All Mine

words: John C. Bunnell ©1993
music: Steve Goodman ("Lincoln Park Pirates")

Oh, the floodlights are dark on my island tonight,
The tyrannosaur's out on the prowl,
My staff is suggesting the raptors are nesting,
And I just heard a stegosaur howl;
There are dinosaurs out there that we didn't clone--
The damn things are breeding, it seems;
But the boneheads who say we can't keep them at bay
Only want to poke holes in my dreams.

REFRAIN:
It's the dim past, brought back at last;
Jurassic Park's master am I;
A world at my feet, and it's nearly complete
And I'll see it made perfect or die!
See what I've made; don't be afraid;
The folk who cry "Danger!" are fools,
For the glitches are small, and we'll soon fix them all,
Proving man and not saurian rules!

Now I'm told that we've lost our computer control;
The electrified fences are down,
And the cars that were touring the park complex during
The incident aren't to be found;
Still, it won't be too long till we find them again,
In fact, there they are--do you see?
Though I have to admit they've been chewed up a bit,
And now, where can my grandchildren be?

REFRAIN

I guess I'll be making some staff changes soon,
We appear to be short a few men;
But they'd not have been killed if they'd just been more skilled,
And they won't let it happen again;
The worst of it's over, the power's back on--
Though it's only the backup as yet;
Yes, I'm sure it will last till the crisis is past--
Er, I meant "inconvenience"; don't fret.

REFRAIN

I hope you've enjoyed yourself while you've been here,
And that once we've rebuilt, you'll be back;
We invite one and all, we excite and enthrall,
And we promise you won't be a snack;
We've learned from this weekend and we will be sure
Our dinosaurs don't get away;
They're enormous, that's right, but they're not very bright,
And it's easy to make them o--[loud crunching/scarfing sounds]